Arprillwabzodhak is a god.

She takes the form of a three hundred metre long, deceitful finch.

Arprillwabzodhak created tapeworms two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Arprillwabzodhak, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Arprillwabzodhak, she will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Arprillwabzodhak's most sacred site is Taktser in China.

Arprillwabzodhak's Holy Commandments

1. Hide from fawn swans for they are unholy.

2. Do not dye your hair turquoise.

3. Never wear indigo scarves.

4. Always pray in complete darkness.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.