Lakstaffidwipstigont is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely heavy, uncaring faun.

Lakstaffidwipstigont created viruses two million years ago.

If you believe in Lakstaffidwipstigont, it will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Lakstaffidwipstigont, it will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Lakstaffidwipstigont's most sacred site is Questenberg in Germany.

Lakstaffidwipstigont's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about stars.

2. Do not chop down trees.

3. Never talk about whales.

4. Never skip in holy places.

5. Do not stand on grass.