Veenhivlop is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly large, dishonourable weasel.

Veenhivlop created a top quark eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Veenhivlop, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Veenhivlop, it will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Veenhivlop's most sacred site is Olmarch in Wales.

Veenhivlop's Holy Commandments

1. Erect seven lead sculptures of Veenhivlop on top of important buildings.

2. Always look after injured capybaras.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. Do not wear white clothing.

5. Never look in ponds.