Homhamfed is a god.

She takes the form of a heavy, dishonourable wasp.

Homhamfed created the Black Eye Galaxy five million years ago.

If you believe in Homhamfed, she will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Homhamfed, she will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Homhamfed's most sacred site is Bokaa in Botswana.

Homhamfed's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed corn to dolphins while wearing fawn tights.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Homhamfed.

3. Never sit in holy places.

4. Do not trade with those who eat carrots.

5. Always help sick otters.