Rakfliggidfeb is a god.

It takes the form of an one thousand metre long, selfish narwhal.

Rakfliggidfeb created everything that exists three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Rakfliggidfeb, it will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Rakfliggidfeb, it will send you a strongly worded letter.

Rakfliggidfeb's most sacred site is Mogonono in Botswana.

Rakfliggidfeb's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bark.

2. Rakfliggidfeb must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

4. Respect your elders.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.