Arflunyart is a god.

He takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, able duck.

Arflunyart created the Sun three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Arflunyart, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Arflunyart, he will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Arflunyart's most sacred site is Paavola in Finland.

Arflunyart's Holy Commandments

1. Never jump near gulls.

2. Respect your elders.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Always help sick moths.

5. Your children must be taught to worship Arflunyart.