Pomnabtim is a god.

He takes the form of a large, slow ferret.

Pomnabtim created a down quark twelve years ago.

If you believe in Pomnabtim, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Pomnabtim, he will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Pomnabtim's most sacred site is Mmankgodi in Botswana.

Pomnabtim's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your face.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Pomnabtim.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.