Zakcarmit is a god.

It takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, unfair shark.

Zakcarmit created dark matter five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Zakcarmit, it will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Zakcarmit, it will turn you into a giant snail.

Zakcarmit's most sacred site is Hondarribia in Spain.

Zakcarmit's Holy Commandments

1. Look mercifully on unfortunate horses.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Zakcarmit.

3. Never mention grasshopers.

4. Do not hurt monkeys.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.