Budjadmip Dagwonfar Tardavfum is a god.

She takes the form of a chunky, astonishing horse.

Budjadmip Dagwonfar Tardavfum created matter four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Budjadmip Dagwonfar Tardavfum, she will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Budjadmip Dagwonfar Tardavfum, she will destroy your favourite solar system.

Budjadmip Dagwonfar Tardavfum's most sacred site is Valdena in Italy.

Budjadmip Dagwonfar Tardavfum's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

3. Pray towards the north.

4. Never write about cell theory.

5. Do not wear titanium on your body.