Yattmigcud is a god.

He takes the form of a blubbery, intelligent centaur.

Yattmigcud created a quark two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Yattmigcud, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Yattmigcud, he will not care.

Yattmigcud's most sacred site is Uruachi in Mexico.

Yattmigcud's Holy Commandments

1. Never sing in the presence of shrews.

2. Erect nine platinum sculptures of Yattmigcud on top of important buildings.

3. Do not eat peas.

4. Retreat if six aardvarks approach from the north.

5. Your children must be taught to worship Yattmigcud.