Fligmidlidyar is a god.

It takes the form of a four hundred metre long, fussy lizard.

Fligmidlidyar created a top quark six billion years ago.

If you believe in Fligmidlidyar, it will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Fligmidlidyar, it will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Fligmidlidyar's most sacred site is Iona in Scotland.

Fligmidlidyar's Holy Commandments

1. Respect your elders.

2. Never eat tomatoes.

3. Always help moths in need.

4. You must never eat pineapples.

5. Never think about the strong nuclear force.