Hanfedsab is a god.

He takes the form of a minute, contented bat.

Hanfedsab created dark energy three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Hanfedsab, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Hanfedsab, he will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Hanfedsab's most sacred site is Kauvatsa in Finland.

Hanfedsab's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Hanfedsab loves cats, so they must be honoured.

4. Do not fashion models of living things.

5. Never mention pigs.