Wadstipfud is a god.

He takes the form of a minute, fast bird.

Wadstipfud created the Cigar Galaxy eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Wadstipfud, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Wadstipfud, he will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Wadstipfud's most sacred site is Taktser in China.

Wadstipfud's Holy Commandments

1. Never laugh in the presence of manatees.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Wadstipfud.

3. Never wear trousers.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of titanium.