Dumlambest is a god.

He takes the form of a six hundred metre long, smart weasel.

Dumlambest created snails four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Dumlambest, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Dumlambest, he will turn you into a frog.

Dumlambest's most sacred site is Artena in Italy.

Dumlambest's Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your face white.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Bats are unholy and should not be approached.

5. Never bounce in holy places.