Lapdunster is a god.

It takes the form of a planet-sized, generous capybara.

Lapdunster created life three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Lapdunster, it will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Lapdunster, it will turn you into a goat.

Lapdunster's most sacred site is Bodieve in England.

Lapdunster's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear aluminium on your body.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Feed all hungry frogs.

5. Never think about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.