Quillvablab is a god.

He takes the form of a plump, self-assured dolphin.

Quillvablab created the planet Venus nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Quillvablab, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Quillvablab, he will have a low opinion of you.

Quillvablab's most sacred site is Leswalt in Scotland.

Quillvablab's Holy Commandments

1. Feed all hungry cats.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

4. Never talk about shrews.

5. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.