Tinjanbonksaw is a god.

She takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, unsympathetic human.

Tinjanbonksaw created tapeworms twelve years ago.

If you believe in Tinjanbonksaw, she will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Tinjanbonksaw, she will try to impress you with trees.

Tinjanbonksaw's most sacred site is Hondarribia in Spain.

Tinjanbonksaw's Holy Commandments

1. Never play with disobedient children.

2. Never laugh near otters.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Never write about evolution by means of natural selection.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of nickel.