Catnurljen is a god.

He takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, bad-tempered snail.

Catnurljen created the Small Magellanic Cloud five billion years ago.

If you believe in Catnurljen, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Catnurljen, he will send you a sign.

Catnurljen's most sacred site is Embalam in India.

Catnurljen's Holy Commandments

1. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

2. You must never eat oranges.

3. Do not commit murder.

4. Erect a large silver sculpture of Catnurljen on top of all buildings.

5. Never eat green fruit.