Tapsinrutt is a god.

She takes the form of a three hundred metre long, witty swan.

Tapsinrutt created a photon seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Tapsinrutt, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Tapsinrutt, she will destroy your favourite solar system.

Tapsinrutt's most sacred site is Kirumampakkam in India.

Tapsinrutt's Holy Commandments

1. Do not trade with those who eat cucumbers.

2. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Tapsinrutt.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. Never talk about fire.

5. Always pray in complete darkness.