Labbegkin is a god.

She takes the form of a huge, egotistical whale.

Labbegkin created Asia six billion years ago.

If you believe in Labbegkin, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Labbegkin, she will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Labbegkin's most sacred site is Wukan in China.

Labbegkin's Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least five thousand metres per day.

2. Do not fashion models of living things.

3. Never hurt squirrels.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Labbegkin.

5. Do not stand on grass.