Dimlagnib is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, moody cyclops-rhinoceros-snail.

Dimlagnib created vertebrates four years ago.

If you believe in Dimlagnib, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Dimlagnib, it will turn you into a blue tit.

Dimlagnib's most sacred site is Dommerby in Denmark.

Dimlagnib's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention aardvarks.

2. Never write about comets.

3. Dimlagnib must be the most important thing in your life.

4. Never talk about pigs.

5. Never think about evolution by means of natural selection.