Zanbagmut is a god.

She takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, tiresome zebra.

Zanbagmut created parasitic wasps nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Zanbagmut, she will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Zanbagmut, she will have a very low opinion of you.

Zanbagmut's most sacred site is Zhelaizhai in China.

Zanbagmut's Holy Commandments

1. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

3. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

4. Erect seven titanium sculptures of Zanbagmut on top of important buildings.

5. Grasshopers are not to be trusted.