Flabgepfat is a god.
She takes the form of an enormous, unjust
snail.
Flabgepfat created light three thousand years ago.
If you believe in
Flabgepfat, she will look after your home planet.
If you do not believe in
Flabgepfat, she will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.
Flabgepfat's most sacred site is Krina in Germany.
Flabgepfat's Holy Commandments1. Worship no other gods but Flabgepfat.
2. Feed all hungry otters.
3. Never talk about black holes.
4. Show mercy to disobedient children.
5. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.