Hamrotren is a god.

She takes the form of a four hundred metre long, passionate yak.

Hamrotren created Africa five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Hamrotren, she will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Hamrotren, she will say rude things about you at parties.

Hamrotren's most sacred site is Hobeck in Germany.

Hamrotren's Holy Commandments

1. Do not commit murder.

2. Respect your elders.

3. Never look in ponds.

4. Hamrotren must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Never sit near monkeys.