Motbatapp is a god.

She takes the form of a chunky, temperamental tapir.

Motbatapp created time and space five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Motbatapp, she will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Motbatapp, she will turn you into an amoeba.

Motbatapp's most sacred site is Borolong in Botswana.

Motbatapp's Holy Commandments

1. Do not kill rats.

2. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Motbatapp.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Do not drink alcohol.