Satkomtit is a god.

It takes the form of a two thousand metre long, passionate coyote.

Satkomtit created the Sun three million years ago.

If you believe in Satkomtit, it will approve.

If you do not believe in Satkomtit, it will cry a lot.

Satkomtit's most sacred site is Ulsted in Denmark.

Satkomtit's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Satkomtit.

2. Do not drink water in mauve rooms.

3. Pray towards the north.

4. Never write about cell theory.

5. Always help monkeys in need.