Satgidfas is a god.

He takes the form of a six hundred metre long, merciless octopus.

Satgidfas created an atom three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Satgidfas, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Satgidfas, he will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Satgidfas' most sacred site is Olmarch in Wales.

Satgidfas' Holy Commandments

1. Never bounce in the presence of snails.

2. Never mention sharks.

3. Hide from cyan frogs for they are unholy.

4. Never write about the weak nuclear force.

5. Do not speak about peanuts.