Dithotmap is a god.

It takes the form of a minute, staggering wolf.

Dithotmap created the planet Earth five billion years ago.

If you believe in Dithotmap, it will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Dithotmap, it will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Dithotmap's most sacred site is Pandamatenga in Botswana.

Dithotmap's Holy Commandments

1. Never hurt pigs.

2. Fast once a month.

3. Always obey Dithotmap's priests.

4. Do not shave your back.

5. Never play with disobedient children.