Nilrawyam Vogdimtin Pomdavtik is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly fat, almighty faun.

Nilrawyam Vogdimtin Pomdavtik created a top quark two years ago.

If you believe in Nilrawyam Vogdimtin Pomdavtik, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Nilrawyam Vogdimtin Pomdavtik, it will destroy your favourite solar system.

Nilrawyam Vogdimtin Pomdavtik's most sacred site is Iona in Scotland.

Nilrawyam Vogdimtin Pomdavtik's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

2. Do not make images of living things.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Nilrawyam Vogdimtin Pomdavtik.

4. Always help bats.

5. Always make a point of helping unfortunate badgers.