Liphatjancatmifpit is a god.

He takes the form of a small, ruthless bee.

Liphatjancatmifpit created a down quark five million years ago.

If you believe in Liphatjancatmifpit, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Liphatjancatmifpit, he will turn you into a mole.

Liphatjancatmifpit's most sacred site is Utti in Finland.

Liphatjancatmifpit's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.

2. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

3. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

4. Always help squirrels.

5. Never talk about galaxies.