Kadbastman Dimbotyatt is a god.

She takes the form of a microscopic, cheerful coyote.

Kadbastman Dimbotyatt created a top quark five million years ago.

If you believe in Kadbastman Dimbotyatt, she will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Kadbastman Dimbotyatt, she will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Kadbastman Dimbotyatt's most sacred site is Diebzig in Germany.

Kadbastman Dimbotyatt's Holy Commandments

1. Hide if three otters approach from the south.

2. Walk at least six thousand metres per day.

3. Always treat swans with great respect.

4. Never hurt porpoises.

5. Do not speak about peanuts.