Hivkopveen is a god.

He takes the form of a five hundred metre long, overgenerous swan.

Hivkopveen created a top quark six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Hivkopveen, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Hivkopveen, he will turn you into a sheep.

Hivkopveen's most sacred site is Thimmanaickenpalayam in India.

Hivkopveen's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from gray otters, for they are unholy.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Hivkopveen.

3. Always help sick moths.

4. Never think about horizontal gene transfer.

5. Do not drink alcohol.