Motbet is a god.

She takes the form of a four hundred metre long, grumpy lobster.

Motbet created Africa three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Motbet, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Motbet, she will make you grow a tail.

Motbet's most sacred site is Minnigaff in Scotland.

Motbet's Holy Commandments

1. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

2. Never wear rings.

3. Do not commit murder.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Never feed bread to doves while wearing mauve dresses.