Paktafbarnxenarm is a god.

She takes the form of a fat, calm rhinoceros.

Paktafbarnxenarm created water eight million years ago.

If you believe in Paktafbarnxenarm, she will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Paktafbarnxenarm, she will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Paktafbarnxenarm's most sacred site is Panayadikuppam in India.

Paktafbarnxenarm's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about comets.

2. Always pray immersed in water.

3. Erect a large gold sculpture of Paktafbarnxenarm on top of all buildings.

4. Never sit in the presence of doves.

5. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Paktafbarnxenarm.