Cipmilwig is a god.

It takes the form of a three thousand metre long, vain rat.

Cipmilwig created bats four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cipmilwig, it will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Cipmilwig, it will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Cipmilwig's most sacred site is Basalorum in Sweden.

Cipmilwig's Holy Commandments

1. Never sit in the presence of mites.

2. Never think about stars.

3. Always look after injured tortoises.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.