Zakcarjadnat is a god.

He takes the form of a chunky, blissful unicorn.

Zakcarjadnat created an atom three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Zakcarjadnat, he will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Zakcarjadnat, he will turn you into a sheep.

Zakcarjadnat's most sacred site is Quenstedt in Germany.

Zakcarjadnat's Holy Commandments

1. You must never eat turnips.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

4. Never think about evolution by means of natural selection.

5. Do not listen to heathen tongues.