Hotvoldim is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, all-knowing eagle.

Hotvoldim created gold seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Hotvoldim, it will approve.

If you do not believe in Hotvoldim, it will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Hotvoldim's most sacred site is Manamedu in India.

Hotvoldim's Holy Commandments

1. Do not chop down trees.

2. Never eat bark.

3. Walk at least seven thousand metres per day.

4. Do not wear tin on your body.

5. Look mercifully on unfortunate mites.