Kinstigflow is a god.

She takes the form of a plump, unjust shark.

Kinstigflow created water seven million years ago.

If you believe in Kinstigflow, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Kinstigflow, she will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Kinstigflow's most sacred site is Vinezac in France.

Kinstigflow's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink water in turquoise rooms.

2. Never think about galaxies.

3. Walk at least four thousand metres per day.

4. Never think ill of sick rats.

5. Do not wear green clothing.