Tailwegsafpark Narlhimdud is a god.

It takes the form of a galaxy-sized, two-faced penguin.

Tailwegsafpark Narlhimdud created viruses three billion years ago.

If you believe in Tailwegsafpark Narlhimdud, it will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Tailwegsafpark Narlhimdud, it will curse you with boils.

Tailwegsafpark Narlhimdud's most sacred site is Poloka in Botswana.

Tailwegsafpark Narlhimdud's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.

2. Always make sure there are no swans in a room before entering it.

3. Never write about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

4. Do not listen to music.

5. Tailwegsafpark Narlhimdud loves grasshopers, so they must be respected.