Kopjapgat is a god.

It takes the form of a very small, amazing rat.

Kopjapgat created a quark four billion years ago.

If you believe in Kopjapgat, it will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Kopjapgat, it will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Kopjapgat's most sacred site is Turckheim in France.

Kopjapgat's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Kopjapgat.

2. You must pray to Kopjapgat six times a day.

3. Your children must be taught to worship Kopjapgat.

4. Do not cook food in pots.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of silver.