Kipyarlbon Ditpomgil is a god.

She takes the form of a corpulent, amazing squirrel.

Kipyarlbon Ditpomgil created parasitic wasps four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Kipyarlbon Ditpomgil, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Kipyarlbon Ditpomgil, she will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.

Kipyarlbon Ditpomgil's most sacred site is Phepheng in Botswana.

Kipyarlbon Ditpomgil's Holy Commandments

1. Always treat great tits with great respect.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

3. Run away from cyan gulls, for they are unholy.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of zinc.

5. Never wear black dresses.