Flatlidmif Danbomflow Fomyokzim is a god.

It takes the form of a three thousand metre long, selfish dryad.

Flatlidmif Danbomflow Fomyokzim created carbon eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Flatlidmif Danbomflow Fomyokzim, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Flatlidmif Danbomflow Fomyokzim, it will turn you into a sparrow.

Flatlidmif Danbomflow Fomyokzim's most sacred site is Randers in Denmark.

Flatlidmif Danbomflow Fomyokzim's Holy Commandments

1. Do not hurt sharks.

2. Do not shave your face.

3. Never wear green rings.

4. Always obey Flatlidmif Danbomflow Fomyokzim's priests.

5. Always take life seriously.