Tonklabbonk is a god.

He takes the form of a very thin, smart snail.

Tonklabbonk created everything that exists eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Tonklabbonk, he will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Tonklabbonk, he will strike you with lightening.

Tonklabbonk's most sacred site is Romlund in Denmark.

Tonklabbonk's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink alcohol.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

3. Never paint your feet orange.

4. Always help hamsters.

5. Feed all hungry birds.