Nurlyamlip is a god.

It takes the form of a six hundred metre long, idiotic monkey.

Nurlyamlip created oxygen seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Nurlyamlip, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Nurlyamlip, it will turn you into a goat.

Nurlyamlip's most sacred site is Alyki in Greece.

Nurlyamlip's Holy Commandments

1. Do not covet oxen.

2. Never skip in holy places.

3. Nurlyamlip loves voles, so they must be honoured.

4. Do not stand on grass.

5. Do not fashion models of living things.