Rilquafyam Midcimgedsid is a god.

She takes the form of a blubbery, omnipotent slug.

Rilquafyam Midcimgedsid created a down quark three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Rilquafyam Midcimgedsid, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Rilquafyam Midcimgedsid, she will curse you with boils.

Rilquafyam Midcimgedsid's most sacred site is Goldcliff in Wales.

Rilquafyam Midcimgedsid's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray immersed in water.

2. Walk at least six thousand metres per day.

3. Never laugh in holy places.

4. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

5. Hide from black otters for they are unholy.