Tofbestveg Fadrawboss is a god.

He takes the form of a slim, temperamental bat.

Tofbestveg Fadrawboss created the planet Jupiter twelve years ago.

If you believe in Tofbestveg Fadrawboss, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Tofbestveg Fadrawboss, he will say rude things about you at parties.

Tofbestveg Fadrawboss' most sacred site is Olmarch in Wales.

Tofbestveg Fadrawboss' Holy Commandments

1. Do not commit murder.

2. Never talk about black holes.

3. Never sit in the presence of mites.

4. Always help pigs.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of zinc.