Negsinpig is a god.

He takes the form of a plump, ill-tempered jellyfish.

Negsinpig created the world four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Negsinpig, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Negsinpig, he will turn you into an amoeba.

Negsinpig's most sacred site is Metsimotlhabe in Botswana.

Negsinpig's Holy Commandments

1. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

2. Fast once a month.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of tin.

4. Do not speak about tomatoes.

5. Always look both ways before crossing roads.