Vigcibstig Sidhitflis is a god.

He takes the form of a giant, almighty finch.

Vigcibstig Sidhitflis created oxygen three billion years ago.

If you believe in Vigcibstig Sidhitflis, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Vigcibstig Sidhitflis, he will send two she bears to sort you out.

Vigcibstig Sidhitflis' most sacred site is Grimme in Germany.

Vigcibstig Sidhitflis' Holy Commandments

1. Never think about evolution by means of natural selection.

2. Always make a point of helping unfortunate seals.

3. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

4. Never talk about cell theory.

5. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.