Bastqueegkembemomincemfigcun is a god.

She takes the form of an one thousand metre long, able crow.

Bastqueegkembemomincemfigcun created energy five billion years ago.

If you believe in Bastqueegkembemomincemfigcun, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Bastqueegkembemomincemfigcun, she will turn you into a puffin.

Bastqueegkembemomincemfigcun's most sacred site is Mazunte in Mexico.

Bastqueegkembemomincemfigcun's Holy Commandments

1. Never sit in the presence of horses.

2. Always treat goats with great respect.

3. Never wear orange boots.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. Always look after injured tapirs.