Arpbestster Tin is a god.

She takes the form of a very large, boastful monkey.

Arpbestster Tin created the Tadpole Galaxy five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Arpbestster Tin, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Arpbestster Tin, she will destroy your favourite planet.

Arpbestster Tin's most sacred site is Amrit in Egypt.

Arpbestster Tin's Holy Commandments

1. Never hurt moths.

2. Run away from blue rats, for they are unholy.

3. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.

4. Walk at least five thousand metres per day.

5. Never wear indigo ear rings.